Fever Dream

It is Tuesday evening, and I’m angry again.  Internet world, I am Susie Green.  I’m not joking. I’m biting off the end of a loaf of chocolate chip banana bread that a friend made me like an ice cream, the whole loaf in my hand. It’s vastly improving my mood, so there.  I’ve taken to telling everyone to “suck an egg” like we did in the schoolyard in the 80s.  It feels strangely rebellious, pulling back this insult from youth. It feels as powerful and defiant as when I would go in my closet when I was mad at my parents in 3rd or 4th grade and whisper curse words.   Continue reading Fever Dream

End of December Getaway

Don't you imagine this on the front of a Christmas card? We were happy to finally see the inside of The Southern Hotel!
Don’t you imagine this on the front of a Christmas card? We were happy to finally see the inside of The Southern Hotel!

We ended the holiday season with our second trip to Ste. Genevieve, Missouri.  Last Christmas we stopped there for a day, and as we wandered around during their yearly Christmas festival, I spied the most charming bed and breakfast.  Kelly and I promised we’d come back to visit someday, and I was so happy we went back after Christmas this year and finally stayed at The Southern Hotel. Continue reading End of December Getaway

Sweet Savannah: Travel Post Day Two (Part I)

As usual, I wake up before my sleeping K.  I scroll through my phone and fidget as long as I can before I can no longer take it.  I think it is possible I might die of boredom by the time he gets up so I’ll have to find something to entertain myself.  Our room is messy—a reflection of a late night, early morning and a bottle of wine.  The suitcases are on the floor, spread open like novels, clothes strewn throughout the room.  I throw open the French doors and head out in my pajamas.  My hair is standing on end, but I don’t care.  I am embracing my Mom’s philosophy that stuck when I was a fat seventeen year old, afraid to venture out to the beach in a swimsuit.  She said, “To Hell with them, Sarah.  None of these people will ever see you again.  Life’s too short.”  I grab my camera off the nightstand before wandering out, “to Hell with them.”

This will be the only hour of the day that isn’t sweltering.  I will even venture to claim that it “feels good.”  It is blissfully quiet.  Silence only echoes this way after a night of revelry.  The sky is a suggestive soft pink; it holds the promise of happiness after several of my darker weeks.  Lately, I’ve been confused and restless, but this morning on the river feels better, more meaningful.  It isn’t manufactured calm like when my bones loosen after swallowing one of my anxiety pills.  It doesn’t feel like I’m swimming underwater and everyone else is speaking to me in garbled voices.  A group runs along the river, and there is a decisive rhythm to their steps.  I lean on the rail and watch a tugboat churn down the river, slow and stubborn like a bumblebee.  Our neighbor comes out on their balcony, and her face is puffy, swollen with sleep. I imagine I look the same way, and we nod at each other. She stands closely enough that I could reach across and touch her, but instead of contrived small talk, we both are anchored, silently watching the boat until it disappears behind a building.  I run inside and wake up Kelly to tell him mercilessly what he’s missed.  “You’re wasting your day,” I admonish like an old Grandmother. Continue reading Sweet Savannah: Travel Post Day Two (Part I)

Thankful Thursday for September 10th

The best grapes ever!
The best grapes ever!
    • Have you guys heard about Cotton Candy Grapes? I found them at Sam’s recently, and I decided to try them. I am happy to report, they taste JUST like cotton candy.  As in, I have already scarfed down most of the container.  My husband wants to know when they will develop funnel cake flavored strawberries?  He says, “Soon, all foods will taste like other foods.  What’s stopping them now?”  It’s a little Jetsons for me, but I really hope he’s right.  It’d be that much easier to be healthy.
    • I watched Alfred Hitchcock Presents for the first time on Hulu recently (It’s on Netflix too for those that have that), and I loved it and have binge watching ever since. I wish it had every episode instead of just select episodes, but there are quite a few seasons so that’s good.
    • I tried this Pumpkin Spice Oatmeal recently, and it tastes just like pumpkin pie. I love it. I used brown sugar Splenda instead of regular brown sugar.
    • I’ve noticed recently that all the perfumes I like in my 30s smell of a bit of fire and smoke. I like scents that smell as if I went for an evening out and somehow ended up next to a campfire. Ages ago, when I used to sit around the fire on Friday nights with my favorite South African, I used to come home and rip off everything that smelled like the fire pit, and toss it into the wash.  Now, I find it a familiar, comforting scent.
    • Have any of you tried those adult coloring books? I’m going to try them out. I can see that being helpful with my anxiety.  I have seen some really great designs, too.  My favorite, are the ones with different cities.  I saw a Paris one somewhere that I’d really like.  Do you like using the colored pencils or pens better with them?
  • I picked up a random candle and TJ Maxx the other day and loved the scent. When I turned it around, it was a Manly Indulgence: Black Tuxedo candle. I don’t know what defines a “Manly Scent” (insert eyeroll), but I bought it for the house anyway.

Breakfast Staple

Breakfast Staple Some mornings I’m a smoothie for breakfast girl, but there are many days that I need something more to tide me over until my lunch break. Lately, my favorite go-to breakfast is oatmeal. I’ll spare you from listing the many health benefits that I’m sure you’ve heard for years on how healthy oatmeal is, but personally, my favorite thing about morning oats is how creative you can be with them. Seriously, you can throw anything in oatmeal, and it seems to turn out great. It’s a forgiving base, and I’m no chef, so I appreciate forgiving! I do like instant oats, but a new favorite of mine–the internet famous, Overnight Oats. I use Olena’s recipe with honey instead of maple syrup. Mainly, because I didn’t have any syrup on hand the first time I made them, and I have yet to get around to buying a bottle. My recent favorite additions to oats are walnuts, hemp seeds, cinnamon, and throw in whatever random fruit is on your counter. There you have a filling breakfast that will keep that mid-morning grouchfest at bay when you curse yourself for not securing the lifestyle of a stay at home cat mom. Someday, folks! Someday.